Love Remains
by Kibo
Summary: AU Eventhough you're gone, love still remains. When Inu-Yasha loses someone he loves, how will he deal?
1. Prologue: Eventhough You're Gone

DISCLAIMER: Sadly, I don't own Inu-Yasha. I will just have to make due with my manga and anime collections.  
  
~*A/N: Now that I'm finally done with "Dial 'H' for Hentai!" it's time for a new fic! I made myself wait, promising not to have more that one fic going at a time. I was recently contemplating my life when I thought of Inu-Yasha (yes, I am obsessed). I found some parallels between our lives, and thought I would explore that in a fic. This is an AU, and some things and characters have been altered to fit the plot my twisted mind has created. Just a warning. Now, go, read, and enjoy!*~  
  
Japanese Vocabulary (I'm still learning, so sorry if it's incorrect!)  
  
moshi moshi: hello/can I help you (often a phone greeting)  
  
konnichi wa: good day  
  
-san: a suffix added to names to show respect  
  
Okaasan: mother  
  
sayonara: good-bye  
  
nani: what  
  
gomen/gomen nasai: i'm sorry/i'm very sorry  
  
tandemonai: it can't be  
  
arigato: thank you  
  
chigiri: promise  
  
ja ne: a farewell greeting, kind of like "later!"  
  
minna: everyone  
  
Prologue: Eventhough You're Gone...  
  
Inu-Yasha sat, curled up on his couch, staring blankly at the television screen. Tears silently streamed down his cheeks, and yet again he was thankful he lived alone. He hated for anyone to see him this weak. 'Why am I crying?' he thought, pulling the blanket tighter around him. 'Another fucking breakdown. I mean, I should be used to them. I've had them every once in a while for years. I know they can come without warning or reason. I'll feel better after a good night's sleep.' This decided, he shut off the television he hadn't been paying attention to. He walked through his small apartment to his bathroom, flicking on the light and staring at his reflection. He had dark circles under his brown eyes, and his waist-length raven hair hung limply around his downcast face. (a small A/N: FYI he's human in this fic)   
  
He opened the medicine chest, reaching for a blister pack of sleeping pills. He popped out a tablet and filled a small dixie cup with water. After putting the rest of the pills back in the cabinet, he closed the door to stare at his reflection. He watched his adam's apple bob as he swallowed the pill with some water. 'Sleep' he thought absently, turning off the light and heading to his room. He set his alarm clock and collapsed onto the bed, pulling the covers up to his chin. 'Tomorrow will be better,' he thought as he drifted off to sleep, the pill finally taking affect. In his sleep, he wouldn't feel this empty aching inside.  
  
The next morning, he awoke to the insistent beeping of his alarm clock. Growling at it, he shut it off, and slowly rose to a sitting position. "I hate mornings," he grumbled to himself, getting out of bed and heading toward the bathroom. He showered and got ready for work, racing out the door a half hour later, late as usual. When he arrived at the small hotel, he went through the motions of starting his shift, still slightly groggy from the medicine he had taken the night before. It was a usual Sunday, rather slow and uneventful. An hour before his shift ended, he dialed his home number to check his messages.  
  
"You have one new message," the electronic voice informed him. He punched "1" on the phone to play the message, and listened to the upset voice of his best friend, Miroku.  
  
"Inu-Yasha, I REALLY need to talk to you, A.S.A.P!" he said. The electronic voice coldly labelled the message with the time and date. Inu-Yasha punched "9" and then "3" to erase the message.  
  
'Did he and Sango get into another damn fight?' he wondered as he pushed the receiver button to hang up, then lifted his finger to hear a dial tone. He absently punched in Miroku's home number, glancing around the lobby to make sure no guests were waiting for him. The phone rang three times before someone answered.  
  
"Moshi moshi?" came a woman's voice.  
  
"Konnichi wa, Houshi-san," Inu-Yasha said to Miroku's mother. "Is Miroku home?"  
  
"Ah, Inu-Yasha! Konnichi wa! Hai, he's here, hold on," Inu-Yasha smiled. She was always so nice to him. In the background he heard her yell, "Miroku!" and a few seconds later, "Phone!"  
  
Seconds later, he heard a familiar voice on the line, "Okaasan, I have it."  
  
"Oh! Good then. Sayonara, Inu-Yasha," Miroku's mother said.  
  
"Sayonara, Houshi-san," Inu-Yasha replied, then heard a *click* as she hung up. "So, Miroku, I just got your message. What did you do to Sango now?" Inu-Yasha questioned.  
  
The line went suddenly quiet, and for a moment Inu-Yasha wondered if he hadn't been disconnected. Quietly, Miroku said, "It's not Sango... Inu-Yasha, I have some bad news."  
  
Inu-Yasha's smirk faltered, his expression sobering. He gulped hard to swallow the knot forming in his throat. "Nani... what is it?"  
  
"Someone close to us, very close to you, has died," Miroku calmly stated.  
  
"Nani?! Who?!" Inu-Yasha gripped the phone's receiver tightly, unaware of his knuckled turning white.  
  
"It is... Kikyo... Inu-Yasha, gomen nasai... gomen," Miroku tried to console his friend. But Inu-Yasha couldn't hear him, he had stopped listening after he had heard her name.  
  
'Ie,' he thought, 'tandemonai. She can't be, she just can't...' When he spoke again, his voice was a whisper, "How?"  
  
Miroku paused, "I'm not sure. All I know is she did it late last night. She committed suicide. I stopped into Sango's work today to say 'hi', and she told me."  
  
"H-how," Inu-Yasha cleared his throat, choking back the tears that threatened to fall. "How did she find out?"  
  
"I'm not sure who told her, all I knew was that you needed to know."  
  
"Arigato, Miroku. I-I'm at work, I should really get going..." Inu-Yasha trailed off, sounding rather lost.  
  
"Gomen, Inu-Yasha! I had no idea, otherwise I would've waited to tell you!"  
  
"Daijoubu, don't worry about it. Do you know where or when the funeral will be?"  
  
"Ie, gomen. If I hear anything, I'll let you know."  
  
"Arigato. Sayonara, Miroku."  
  
"Sayonara, Inu-Yasha."  
  
Inu-Yasha hung up the phone numbly, looked to make sure he was alone in the lobby, and then leaned against the wall behind the counter. He stared out the window without seeing, and slowly slid to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest. 'She's gone,' he thought, and his resolve finally cracked. For the second time that weekend, he found himself crying. This time, however, he didn't care who saw him. Without her in his life, he just didn't care. He didn't care about anything anymore.  
  
~*A/N: Sooo... yeah, I know it's kinda depressing. I'm not sure how it will end, but there will be some happiness and fluffiness in chapters to come! Chigiri! Ja ne, minna!*~ 


	2. Ch 1: Bittersweet Memories

DISCLAIMER: Nope, don't own it. Nope, can't sue.  
  
~*A/N: Konnichi wa, minna! Kibo, the violet-haired vixen here! Another chapter done! Yay! I know, I'm surprisingly chipper for the authoress of such a depressing and angsty fic, but I can't help it! I'm downright giddy... now I'm scared of myself... okay, I'll stop rambling now. On with the story!*~  
  
Furiri: Here ya go! Gomen for the review!  
  
Japanese Translations:  
  
Oneesan: older sister  
  
Obaasan: grandmother  
  
Imoutosan: younger sister  
  
Oya: parents  
  
Chapter One: Bittersweet Memories  
  
It had been months. Inu-Yasha had attended Kikyo's funeral a week and a half after Miroku's disturbing phone call. He had switched shifts with a co-worker to attend, and Miroku had driven him, supported him, and let him cry on his shoulder. Somehow, Inu-Yasha had survived the heart-breaking evening, surrounded by old friends he hadn't seen in years, all sharing the same grief. She had been cremated, so the altar had held a large framed picture of her, smiling. The service was short and simple, just the way she would've wanted it. He remembered seeing her imoutosan, Kaede, surrounded by her friends. The teenager he saw looked so different than the little girl he remembered following her oneesan around.  
  
That had been in mid-November. Now, in late January, he was finally sleeping again, finally eating again, and could actually smile. Well, it was more of a smirk, and wasn't completely genuine, but it was progress. Memories of her still haunted him at every turn. Just when he managed to not think of her, someone would say something or do something to remind him of her. He couldn't listen to the radio anymore; it seemed the dj's were out to get him. He lay in bed, having just read a book. It had been about two soulmates, destined to be together. They each recalled past lives, and their deaths. When they met in the present and were face to face, everything came back. One had always died, and the other had followed the one, so that they could be reincarnated together and possibly meet again. The ending made him think of Kikyo, and he burst into tears. Would it be too late for him to follow her?  
  
Not that he hadn't considered it before. Many times. But everytime, he would shy away, just like Hamlet had said in Shakespeare's words, "But that dread of something after death, The undiscover'd country from whose bourn No traveller returns, puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of?" At Kikyo's funeral, he also had seen what it does to those left behind. He couldn't do that to them, to the people he cared about, no matter how much he loved and missed Kikyo.  
  
The streetlight outside his window bathed his room in orange light. Inu-Yasha watched the ceiling fan spin around lazily, casting shadows over the room. His mind went back to the night he had first met her. It was mid-July. He had turned 15 at the end of May. He and his then-best friend, Naraku, had walked into the downtown area of the small city they lived in. They came to a fast food restaurant, and bought sodas. They walked out to find Kagura, one of Inu-Yasha's close friends, in the parking lot with a group of girl and boys. Some he recognized from school, some he didn't. He and Naraku joined the group, and walked down the "main drag".  
  
Kikyo had approached him, confident and cocky. He had fallen in love with her at first site. She was beautiful, physically and emotionally. They talked as they walked, lost to the rest of the group. They stopped at a laundromat, smoking and sipping sodas. A white pick-up truck pulled into the parking lot, and a boy he vaguely recognized got out. They all ended up piling into the flatbed of the truck, and driving to a park. A few people jumped into the lake, swimming in thier clothes. Inu-Yasha, Naraku, and Kikyo just stood and watched, laughing. Naraku had glanced at his watch, and told Inu-Yasha they had to go. Everyone had piled back into the truck and dropped the two off at home. Inu-Yasha had gone home smiling that night.  
  
The next night, sitting at home, his phone rang. It had been Kikyo. She denied that Kagura had given her his number, and refused to tell him how she had gotten it. For weeks they talked nightly, for hours on end, until Inu-Yasha's okaasan got on the phone and told him to go to bed. He learned much of the girl in that time. Her birthday was only two days after his, she had grown up in the town just as he had, she was living with her obaasan, her okaasan and imoutosan lived in a town 30 miles away. She had lived with them for two years, attending middle school in another district, but missing her friends, wishing to return to their school district. So her obaasan agreed to let her live there, in her basement.  
  
One late night, they talked about marriage. They promised each other that "someday" they would marry each other. After about a month of talks like this, they had started seriously dating. That had lasted only a week, but they had stayed good friends. They were there for each other, even when Kikyo's okaasan had told her the most disturbing news of her life. The man she believed to be her otousan, who had raised her since she could remember, wasn't her biological otousan. He had divorced from her okaasan a few years ago, and moved 4 hours away. She still visited him regularly. Apparently her okaasan had been married before this, but had left him shortly after Kikyo's birth. When she remarried, she changed Kikyo's middle and last names to hide her from her violent otousan. Inu-Yasha was confused when she legally changed her name back after receiving this information. Her explanation had been, "It's who I really am. I can't deny that."  
  
That brought back the night she had first cried in front of him. They were watching Rain Man, cuddled together on her couch. She suddenly went stiff in his arms, and rolled over to bury her face in his chest. He remembered her being embarrassed, and him telling her not to be. She explained that the movie was reminding her of her family, of how she wished they were closer. He hugged her closer, comforting her. She had looked up at him, smiling through her tears, and kissed him. They had then vacated the couch, opting for her bed. That night they made sweet love, him letting her know that she wasn't alone.   
  
Later that night, she had begged him to stay, to hold her while she slept. He would've, but it was late, and his oya would've flipped had he not come home. Especially if they found out that he had spent the night at her apartment and not bothered to call and let them know. If he had called, they would have been ok with it, but it was two in the morning, and he hadn't wanted to wake them. So he left, her pleas tearing at his heart the whole time.  
  
'That was the last time we made love,' he thought, sorrowfully. 'How I wish it hadn't been. If I could've just swallowed my damn pride, let her know how much I loved her, maybe she'd be here with me today. I wouldn't feel this aching inside, this emptiness.'  
  
Since they met, Kikyo had drifted in and out of his life. She moved around a lot, and had gone to live with her "otousan"- the man who had raised her - to finish high school. After that, she kept drifting around, the tide occasionally carrying her back into town. Wherever she was, she never hesitated to call him to say "Happy birthday," when that time of year rolled around. Knowing that he wouldn't receive that call this May tore at his already fragile heart. They would have tuned 21 together, and had always said they would party together. He eventually cried himself softly to sleep.  
  
~*A/N: Sorry for another depressing chappy, but it's necessary to set up the history between them. I promise it will get happy! And he will meet Kagome! So keep reading! Ja ne, minna!*~ 


	3. Ch 2: Bittersweet Memories 2

~*A/N: Kami-sama, help me! My muse has me working over-time. It's now 1:15 in the a.m. and I'm still writing. So, without further ado, here's chapter two! Hey, that rhymed! Yay!*~  
  
DISCLAIMER: *sighs* No, I don't own it...  
  
Japanese Translation:  
  
Kami-sama: dear God (or thereabouts)  
  
Oniisan: older brother  
  
Chapter Two: Bittersweet Memories 2  
  
Inu-Yasha drove throught the darkened backroads, snowbanks piled up at their sides. He sighed. He had just dropped off his friend, Hiten, at his oya's house, out in the country outside town. Hiten's girlfriend, Eri, had commited suicide last week, and they had just left the funeral. Eri had ended it exactly as Kikyo had, exactly three months later. Inu-Yasha had been friends with her for years, but had to push his own grief for her away. Hiten had needed his support, and he was exhausted. He absently thought he had to thank Miroku for doing the same for him.  
  
He had his radio cranked as he lit a cigarette. He had started the terrible habit up on that fateful day of Miroku's phone call. It seemed that he had separated his life into two parts; before Miroku called, and after. "Rooster" by Alice In Chains came on the radio. 'Kikyo loved this song,' he thought, plunging himself back into memories of her.  
  
About six months after meeting her, sometime around Christmas, Kagura's oya had left town. Kagura had, of course, thrown a party. Kagura had this odd obsession with Minnie Mouse. Odd, because the girl was anything but girly. She always was the kind of girl that no one messed with. So, for her present Inu-Yasha got her a Minnie plushie from the Disney store, and for Kikyo he got an Alice In Chains t-shirt.  
  
He was surprised when, after opening their presents and thanking him, Kagura held up a finger, heading to her room. She returned moments later, a package half-hidden behind her back. Handing it to Inu-Yasha, he took the gift, eagerly unwrapping it. Kagura had told him it was from Kikyo as well. He opened the box, finding a woven blanket inside a zippered clear plastic bag. Looking at the picture on the information sheet enclosed, he saw that the design on it was that of Mickey Mouse. It wasn't necessarily something he would've bought for himself, but since it was from them, he would always keep it.  
  
Inu-Yasha smiled at the memory. He still had the blanket, and often used it to cover-up with when he layed on the couch. He had slept with it since Kikyo's death. A little piece of her no one could ever take from him. Suddenly his ears were filled with the familiar voice of Kurt Cobain singing "Drain You."  
  
He recalled the day before he and Kikyo had broken up. They had only known each other a little over a month, but it felt like a lifetime. School wouldn't start for another week, and she had some paperwork to straighten out. He met her at school and they walked back to his house. His oya were both at work, so he was alone with Kikyo. They lay on his bed for hours, talking. She spotted a poster of Kurt Cobain hanging on his wall, and started belittling the man. She got so angry, going on and on about how he was such a loser, having given up on life the way he did. Inu-Yasha understood that desire all too well, and sympathized with the singer. Kikyo got so angry with the discussion, she had reached up and torn the poster off of the wall, crumpling it in her hands.  
  
Shocked, Inu-Yasha had picked up the balled poster, smoothing it and returning it to its rightful place on his wall. He scowled at her. She apoligized, and went on to praise his poster of Layne Staley. She really adored Alice In Chains.  
  
He then skipped ahead six or so months, to a night he sat on the phone with her, watching Alice In Chains Unplugged on MTV. Kikyo was taping it, of course. Shortly after, Inu-Yasha bought the CD. His favorite song was "Down In A Hole". He remembered the first time he played it for her. His oya were out of town, and he threw a party. He told his friends that they could only smoke in his room, and five or so of them were sitting there. He sat in his chair, Kikyo in his lap, the CD playing. After his song was over, Kikyo skipped to "Rooster", saying it was "so much better."   
  
She had slept downstairs on the couch that night, along with a few others. The next morning, he skipped school, opting to spend time with her. His oniisan had been so angry that afternoon when he got home from work and found him home. His friends had promptly taken him to school at Sesshomaru's insistence. 'Pointless,' he thought, recalling the day, 'I only went to last hour, and that was study hall.'  
  
His memory skipped ahead a few years, to the month he had moved out of his oya's house. Kikyo had been living in Tokyo, and called to chat. Inu-Yasha was putting away the newest additions to his anime collection that had come in the mail that day. Kikyo told him how much she missed him, how she wished she could see him. She promised to come and visit within the month. She never came. He remembered sitting at home, waiting for the phone call. It came two months later, to say "Happy birthday". He didn't question her, it was just the way Kikyo was.  
  
Six months ago, she had come back to town, supposedly to stay. Apparently her okaasan and imoutosan had recently moved north, closer to where her "otousan" currently lived. So she was staying with friends. She called him at work, having forgotten his new number. Inu-Yasha recalled the confused looks from his coworkers that day. He had been downright giddy at hearing her voice. No matter how long she stayed out of touch, how many times she said she'd come when she didn't, he didn't care. He knew she'd always come back.  
  
He had picked her up that night, and they stayed up late talking. At one point, he noticed scars on both wrists. His blood ran cold. He thought of Teichi, a boy he had met only once or twice, who had been a good friend of his close friend, Hiten. Teichi had committed suicide a few months before, saying he wanted to set an example to his friends so they would all straighten out their lives. He hardly knew the boy, yet it saddened him to know that the smiling youth would never smile again. He couldn't imagine never being on the receiving end of Kikyo's scowls again.  
  
Inu-Yasha looked her in the eyes, yelling at her, saying that if she ever did that he'd have to come and kick her dead ass. He didn't know what else to say. "If I could only have that night back," he mumbled to himself, turning down the road that would take him home.  
  
He recalled the last time he saw her. He had gone to dinner with Hiten and Eri. Kikyo had been their waitress. Inu-Yasha jumped up from the table to hug her. He had thought she went back to her okaasan's after the night he had flipped out on her. She had, but returned. Only two months had passed. She was again staying with friends, and intended to find an apartment after she had some income. They chatted a little, Hiten and Eri inquiring after her well-being. They had all been friends in high school. Kikyo seemed cheerful, happy even. Inu-Yasha slipped her his phone number before they left, since she had lost it, again. But he didn't care. He never cared, as long as Kikyo was near.  
  
A few weeks later she was dead. Had hung herself in her mother's garage. What happened in those weeks to change her? He knew her well enough to know that her happiness had been genuine. But, somehow, she had forgotten. Kagura said she spoke to Kikyo over the phone earlier that day. She had seemed depressed, but that was nothing new. So what had pushed her over the edge?  
  
Inu-Yasha felt hot tears make trails down his face as he parked his car in the garage. He got out, praying that he could hold out until he was up the stairs and through the door. Taking large quieting breaths, he fumbled his key in the lock and pushed the door open, slamming it on the world.  
  
Review Responses:  
  
Kay Kylo: Gomen, no Kagome just yet. Gotta set up the story before she comes in, ne?  
  
darkrose2006: Sorry to hear about your story. :*( But glad to see you got it back up and running! ;)  
  
Furiri: I know it's weird having Inu depressed, but next chappie will be less depressing, I promise.  
  
~*A/N: Ok, you've lived through enough memories for now. Like I said, it's important for you to understand just how important Kikyo was to him. I'm going to try to keep people as in-character as possible, although relationships may be invented or altered, as is obvious with Hiten/Eri. Or Inu-Yasha and Hiten being friends. I've rambled long enough. The actual "story" will start next chapter! Chigiri! Ja ne, minna! Oh, and don't forget to review!*~ 


	4. Ch 3: Forgetting

DISCLAIMER: Where is he? *pats pockets* I know I had him here somewhere... *shrugs* It seems I've lost Inu-Yasha, so, no, I don't own him. P.S. I don't own YuGiOh or Lucky Charms, either.  
  
~*A/N: Finally, here's a chapter that's not pure memories. Hope they set up the proper emotional setting, though. So, here it is, chapter 3! Enjoy!*~  
  
Japanese Translations:  
  
Onna: woman  
  
Mochiron: of course, naturally, certainly  
  
Suteneko: stray cat  
  
Neko: cat  
  
Koneko: kitten  
  
Osuneko: tomcat  
  
Yuuryou: fine, excellent  
  
Seikai: correct, right  
  
Honto: really, truly  
  
Sugoi: amazing  
  
Ano: um  
  
Chikushou: damn  
  
-chan: a term of endearment  
  
Chapter Three: Forgetting  
  
Inu-Yasha raced home from work. It was Thursday, his twenty-first birthday. He had taken off the next four days, intending to celebrate thoroughly. As soon as he reached his apartment, he leapt up the steps and burst through the door, startling his neko. He had gotten him from his oniisan's girlfriend, Rin. Rin had "rescued" the poor suteneko, who had somehow managed to get burrdocks stuck all in his fur. After enlisting Inu-Yasha's aid in righting the osuneko's long black and white fur, he had fallen in love with the koneko. Not that he would ever admit that to anyone else, he just said he felt sorry for the damn thing.  
  
"Gomen, Neko-chan," he muttered, rubbing the neko's head as he went for his room. A throaty miaow was his answer. He had named the cat, appropriately, Neko. Sesshomaru had praised his originality. Inu-Yasha snorted at the thought, quickly changing from his work clothes into jeans and a t-shirt. He stopped at the bathroom, running a brush through his long hair before securing it in a low ponytail. As he exited the bathroom, a knock came to the door.  
  
He opened it to find Rin smiling at him, an arm held behind her back. "Konban wa, Inu-chan," she said, walking through the door he held open. "These are from Sesshomaru and I," she said, producing a bouquet of yellow daisies and a card from behind her back.   
  
Inu-Yasha smirked as he took them, 'Yellow daisies, huh? Sesshy must be going soft over this onna.' He quickly grabbed a large cup from his cupboard, half-filling it with water. He owned no vases, so this would just have to do. Plopping the daisies into the cup, he turned to the still-smiling Rin.  
  
"Are you ready for tonight?" Rin inquired, a mischevious glint in her eye.  
  
Inu-Yasha opened the card, shaking his head. 'Kami-sama, am I even gonna be able to walk up my stairs later? Good thing she and Sesshy are driving tonight.' He read the humorous card, and stuck it to his fridge with a magnet. "Mochiron. I've been practicing for this day since I was fourteen," he smirked at her, heading for the door.  
  
"Sayonara, Neko-chan," Rin said, bending to pet the purring neko.  
  
"Ja ne, Neko," Inu-Yasha called over his shoulder, grabbing his keys from their place on the bannister and following Rin out the door.  
  
"So, Inu-chan," Rin asked after they had gotten into Sesshomaru's truck. "How's it feel to finally be 21?"  
  
"Yuuryou. Seems like I've been waiting forever, though." He idly watched the houses fly by as Rin drove towards town.  
  
"You took off of work all weekend, seikai?"  
  
"Hai, and tomorrow and Monday, as well."  
  
"Honto?"  
  
"Honto."  
  
"Sugoi! You're really going to party it up, ne?"  
  
"Hai. I'm going out with some friends tomorrow night, and I'm having a barbecue on Sunday."  
  
"What about Saturday? Or will you need a day to recoup?"  
  
"I have someone to visit on Saturday." Saturday, Kikyo's birthday. He would go to visit her grave. He was unsure of where it was, but he would find it. Rin pulled into a parking spot behind the bar. They walked up to the door, Rin opening it and ushering him in first.  
  
Inu-Yasha stopped dead in his tracks when the occupants of the bar yelled "Happy Birthday!" Two girls from his work ran up to him and handed him a beer. "What kinda shot you want first?" Asuka, the one who had handed him the beer, asked, pulling him towards the bar.  
  
"Ano, what's good?" he asked. He had only taken shots out of his oya's liquor bottles at home, and that had all been hard alcohol. Subsequently, he wasn't very fond of taking shots.  
  
"How about a 'lemon drop'?" Asuka asked, holding up three fingers to the waiting bartender. After a little mixing, he placed three full shot glasses on the bar, a lemon slice next to each. Asuka explained, "You take the shot quickly, then bite on the lemon."  
  
Inu-Yasha picked up his shot glass, clinking it with the others before slamming it down. The alcohol burnt a fiery trail down his throat as he put the lemon wedge into his mouth. He sucked the bitter juice, cooling the fire that had settled in his belly.  
  
The night was filled with shots and beers, all bought by someone wishing him a "Happy Birthday". He smiled at them all through his alcohol-infused stupor, having finally forgotten his grief of the past six months. As the bar closed, he approached Rin and Sesshomaru. On the table they occupied lay chips and dip, a cake, and a wrapped bottle with birthday ballons tied to it. 'Sesshy really went all out,' Inu-Yasha smirked to himself.  
  
"Inu-chan," Rin slurred. She had been enjoying herself tonight, too. His oniisan stared at him soberly.  
  
"Hai, Rin-chan," Inu-Yasha replied, throwing a loving arm over the small onna's shoulders.  
  
"Ready to go?" Sesshomaru asked. Inu-Yasha merely nodded, removing his arm from around Rin to help his oniisan carry the left-over food. When they reached his apartment, Sesshomaru carried most of the food, while Inu-Yasha clutched the bottle. Sesshomaru followed Inu-Yasha up the steps, praying he didn't fall. Although he faltered a few times in his steps, he remained upright. After seeing him safely inside, Sesshomaru waved and left, closing the door behind him.  
  
Inu-Yasha put away the food, stumbling slightly as he moved around the kitchen. It didn't help any that Neko had decided it was a good time to rub up against his master's legs. Inu-Yasha cursed as he tripped on the troublesome neko for the fifth time, and Neko took off to hide under the bed. Apparently, he had decided his tail had been assaulted enough for one night.  
  
After unwrapping the bottle of rum his oniisan had given him, he put it in the cupboard with his other liquor. He poured himself a glass of water, and collapsed onto the couch. He idly flipped through the channels, lighting up a cigarette. 'Chikushou. I went through a pack and a half,' he thought, counting his remaining cigarettes before tossing the pack aside.  
  
After finishing the cigarette and glass of water, he switched off the television. He stumbled to the bathroom, wanting to rid his mouth of the taste of an ashtray before passing out. That task done, he stripped his clothes off as he went to his room, then collapsed onto the bed in exhaustion. It took him mere seconds to fall into unconsciousness. For the first time in six months, he slept easily and without interruption.  
  
Inu-Yasha awoke the next day to the sound of a loud car engine. 'Wait, that's too loud to be a car on the street. Or did I leave my window open last night?' his sleep-clouded mind attempted to discern the source of the sound. Then he registered something fuzzy brushing against his forehead. There was a ball of fur above his head on the pillow. He reached up to touch it, and felt a rough sand-paper like surface flick over his skin. 'Neko,' his mind identified. Neko was asleep on his head again, purring loudly. Inu-Yasha smiled, swinging his legs over the side of the bed as he sat up. He held the purring koneko in his lap, absently scratching behind his ears.  
  
Neko eventually decided he had enough, and leapt from Inu-Yasha's lap, his tail swaying behind him as he exited the room. Inu-Yasha rubbed the sleep from his eyes, stretching and yawning as he stood. He absently ran his hands through his hair as his eyes fell on the clock. "Chikushou! Two thirty?!" he muttered. "Way to sleep the day away." He made his way to the bathroom, picking up his discarded clothes from the night before.  
  
After putting the clothes in the hamper and pulling on a clean t-shirt, he went to the kitchen to scrounge up some breakfast. Five minutes later found him on the couch, watching YuGiOh and happily munching on Lucky Charms. He placed the bowl, now containing only milk, on the floor. Neko came running out of his hiding place, and eagerly lapped at the milk. Inu-Yasha looked again at the clock. "Three o'clock. Miroku works until, what, six? So that gives me a few hours before I have to get ready. What am I gonna do, Neko?" he asked, looking down. Neko paused, turning his head up to miaow at his master, before returning to his milk. Inu-Yasha chuckled, reaching down to pet the osuneko affectionately. "Sounds good to me, Neko-chan. Laziness it is." With that said, he lounged back on the couch, becoming totally absorbed in the current duel on his television screen.  
  
~*A/N: So, in case you haven't noticed, I really like to use Japanese words in my story. Hope that isn't too confusing for you readers, all the going back and forth. As a student of the language, I feel compelled to include it in my story. If it annoys you, let me know. I want your feedback, good or bad! Honto! Ja ne, minna!*~ 


	5. Ch 4: Celebrations

~*A/N: Not one review, huh? So, is anyone reading this anymore? Sometimes I wonder. Well, whether or not anyone cares, here's another chapter. Enjoy!*~  
  
DISCLAIMER: What would ever make you think that? I'm Kibo, Ki-Bo! And who is this Rumiko person you keep talking about?  
  
Chapter 4: Celebrations  
  
Inu-Yasha had fallen asleep on the couch. Neko had curled up in his lap and joined him. The ringing phone snapped Inu-Yasha awake, and he stood suddenly, spilling the poor neko onto the floor. Neko miaowed a small complaint at Inu-Yasha as he ran for the phone. "Moshi, moshi?" Inu-Yasha panted into the phone.  
  
A chuckle came over the line, "Did I interrupt something?"  
  
"Miroku, you hentai! I just passed out on the couch and had to run to get the phone!"  
  
Another chuckle, "Passed out, huh? Rough night last night?"  
  
"You have no idea. So, what's the plan for tonight?"  
  
"Still feeling up to it? You better be. Well, you can come meet me here, then we'll go meet Akira and Shinji at Akira and Naraku's place. Then we'll head over to Izanami for a late dinner and drinks. If it gets boring, we can always go club hopping, but Izanami usually has a good crowd."  
  
"Whatever you think, Miroku. I put myself into your capable hands."  
  
"You feeling okay, Yash? You're less sarcastic than usual today?"  
  
"Ha ha, very funny. I'm just feeling a little tired still from last night."  
  
"Hungover?"  
  
"Ie, just tired."  
  
"If you say so."  
  
"So, what time do you want me to meet you?"  
  
"Ano, what time is it, six? How 'bout around seven-thirty? Should give you plenty of time to get ready and get here."  
  
"Sounds good, I'll see ya then."  
  
"All right, ja ne."  
  
"Ja ne," Inu-Yasha pushed the button to disconnect, then placed the phone back in its charger. Walking to the bathroom, he once again tripped on the troublesome neko, who had chosen just that moment to tangle himself around his master's ankles. "Bakarro," Inu-Yasha mumbled, nudging the neko away with his foot.  
  
An hour and a half later found Inu-Yasha ringing Miroku's doorbell. "Who is it?" Miroku's voice came through the crackling speaker.  
  
"Me," was Inu-Yasha's short reply. The speaker clicked off, and he was buzzed in. Inu-Yasha made short work of the two flights of stairs, knocking on Miroku's door. The door opened to reveal Miroku, only half-dressed. "What the hell, Miroku, I thought we were heading out right away?" Inu-Yasha chastised, following Miroku in and closing the door behind him.  
  
"I'm almost ready," Miroku's voice came from the bathroom. Inu-Yasha walked over and leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest. He watched as Miroku brushed his partially damp hair back into his patented ponytail. Inu-Yasha stepped out of the way as Miroku headed towards his room, and put on a collared purple button-down shirt, tucking it into his black dress pants. He sat on his bed to put on his shoes.  
  
"So, are we gonna have to wait for Akira and Shinji to finish getting ready, too?" Inu-Yasha smirked from the bedroom doorway.  
  
Miroku looked up from tying his shoe, quirking an eyebrow, "You mean will we have to hang out with Naraku? No, he's out."  
  
"I didn't say anything about HIM."  
  
Miroku stood, "Shinji said that when he got your message about Kikyo, he just shrugged and erased it. Shinji all went off on him, saying 'Wasn't she your friend? How can you not care?'"  
  
Inu-Yasha shrugged in reply, suddenly very interested in making sure his shirt was buttoned correctly. He wore a collarless red button-down shirt, also tucked into black dress pants, and wore his hair loose around his shoulders. Miroku bent down to scratch his neko's ears before grabbing his keys and heading toward the door, Inu-Yasha following silently behind. They exited the building and rode the train over to Shinji's, arriving twenty minutes later. As Inu-Yasha had suspected, neither Shinji nor Akira were ready when they arrived. After waiting five minutes for them to answer the door, it was opened to show Shinji dressed much as Miroku had been at Inu-Yasha's arrival. Miroku and Inu-Yasha followed Shinji to his bedroom where Akira was deliberating on which tie to wear.  
  
"A tie?" Miroku questioned, eyes wide. "It's Izanami, they don't have THAT strict of a dress code."  
  
"I felt like getting dressed up, ok?" Akira said, holding up a tie in each hand. "Which one?"  
  
Miroku took on a pose of deep thought - left arm crossed over his middle, right elbow resting on his left arm, right hand to his chin. After a few seconds of pondering, he picked the one in Akira's right hand. By this time, Shinji had finished dressing, and was wearing grey dress pants, a black collared button-down shirt, and a grey tie to match his pants. Akira quickly tied the black tie and straightened the collar of his blue shirt, tucking it into his black panst and slipping on his shoes. Fifteen minutes after Inu-Yasha and Miroku's arrival, they were finally on their way.  
  
"So, where's Naraku tonight?" Akira asked Shinji as they headed toward the club. Inu-Yasha cringed visibly. The ending of their long friendship had not been pleasant.  
  
"Ano, I think he went out with some guys from school. He probably won't get home until late tomorrow morning. He usually finds some girl to take him home," Shinji said with a suggestive wink.  
  
His three companions merely grumbled in response. That's what had started the fight between Inu-Yasha and Naraku in the first place. Naraku had a really sweet girlfriend, and they had dated for awhile. A guy that Inu-Yasha worked with went to school with Naraku, and started telling him stories of how they went out to clubs, and how Naraku had been meeting random girls, and going home with them. Shortly after, Naraku told his girlfriend he thought that they needed a break. A few months later, Inu-Yasha, Shinji, Miroku, and Naraku's ex-girlfriend had all gone out to dinner. Naraku had come up in conversation, and his ex made a comment about him cheating on her. Inu-Yasha just had to open his big mouth, and spill about the stories he had heard. Then the proverbial shit hit the fan. She had called Naraku, and demanded he return everything of hers he still had. When Naraku turned to Shinji, rather confused, Shinji described the conversation to him. He had gotten so angry with Inu-Yasha he had refused to talk to him, and still wouldn't to this day.  
  
They reached the club, where a long line led from the front door for about six meters. Miroku walked past the line and up to the bouncer. "Miroku! How ya been?" the bouncer smiled.  
  
"Not bad, not bad, you?"  
  
"Yuuryou. How many with you?"  
  
"Three," Miroku gestured to his friends standing behind him.  
  
"Go right in." He turned to the man behind him, "Four coming in!" The man he had spoken to held a door open for them. They passed through the door and a set of thick red velvet draps, into the busy restaurant area of the club. A rather tall woman came up to them right away.  
  
"Four? Right this way please," her deep voice rumbled, and she turned.  
  
"She's a he," Miroku mouthed to a puzzled Inu-Yasha, following the s/he to their table.  
  
After setting down their menus, s/he turned and disappeared into the crowd. "Well, he's very pretty. Too tall, and big feet, but very pretty just the same," Inu-Yasha commented, smirking.  
  
"I'm going to go get us drinks right away," Miroku commented, grabbing Inu-Yasha's arm before he could sit. "And you're coming with me."  
  
"Why?" Inu-Yasha tried to pull his arm away.  
  
"Because if we tell them it's your birthday, they'll give us free drinks."  
  
"Oh," Inu-Yasha mumbled, following Miroku toward the bar.  
  
As the boys were finishing eating, the place became more crowded, and rivers of people were flowing up and down the main stairs. "Let's go dance," Miroku said, taking his drink and standing, a mischevious glint in his eye. Inu-Yasha shrugged and picked up his drink, following him. Shinji and Akira trailed behind. After making their way upstairs and weaving through the crowd, they finally reached the crowded dancefloor. Inu-Yasha's three friends immediately found eager dance partners. Inu-Yasha preferred to lean against the wall and watch.  
  
When the music changed from hip-hop to techno, Miroku appeared in front of Inu-Yasha, and pulled him onto the dancefloor. The other two had also abandoned their dance partners, and the four of them danced until they dripped with sweat. "Drinks!" Miroku yelled in Inu-Yasha's ear, attempting to be heard over the pounding beat pouring from the speakers. Inu-Yasha nodded mutely, and they made their way towards the bar. He spotted a few girls in the crowd that sparked his interest, but all appeared to be taken.  
  
'Oh, well,' he thought. 'Not like I'm really looking right now anyways.' He joined Miroku at the bar and ordered a beer.  
  
Before they knew it, the music had died down and the bartenders were yelling out for "last call". The four made their way out of the club, trying to avoid the rush. After walking Shinji and Akira back to Shinji's apartment, Miroku and Inu-Yasha hopped the train back to Miroku's apartment. Inu-Yasha denied Miroku's invitation to crash on his couch, stating that he'd make it home just fine, and walked to the train station, preparing for the long ride back across town.  
  
He reached his apartment forty-five minutes later, completely exhausted. He stripped off his sweaty clothes, sitting on the couch in his boxers, a glass of water in hand. Neko jumped into his lap, purring. Inu-Yasha scratched his ears distractedly, earning a head-butt from the neko. 'Happy birthday to me...'  
  
~*A/N: Hmmm... not sure if I like this chappy yet. I know, I know, get to the part where he meets Kagome. Well, I've actually got this one planned out, *readers all collapse from shock* AND I'm sorry to say they won't meet until chapter nine... or so. It will be worth the wait, at least I think so. So, if you're reading this, please review and give me a little feedback. Ja ne, minna!*~ 


	6. Ch 5: Conversations With The Dead & Furt...

~*A/N: Pocky! While xmas shopping today, I took a small detour to Suncoast's anime and manga section, to discover box upon box of these delicious little sticks. No more internet ordering necessary, pocky lovers! Anyway, onto the next chapter. Enjoy!*~  
  
DISCLAIMER: *curled up in a ball, rocking* I don't own it... I don't own it... *men in white coats barge into room* No! I have to write... My computer!  
  
Japanese translations:  
  
hentai: pervert  
  
irokichigai: sex maniac  
  
koi: love  
  
ototo: younger brother  
  
Chapter 5: Conversations With The Dead and Further Celebrations  
  
Inu-Yasha stood on his patio, dumping a bag of charcoal into the grill. After dousing it with lighter fluid, he threw a lit match, a fireball shooting into the air. "Inu-Yasha!" Miroku called from behind him, causing him to turn.  
  
"Well, if anyone didn't know where you lived, they would be able to find their way now," Sango giggled, holding Miroku's hand.  
  
"Ice?" Miroku asked, holding up a bag.  
  
"Hai, arigatou," Inu-Yasha reached for it, placing it in the cooler next to him.  
  
"What was the deal with the fireworks a minute ago?" Hiten asked, walking up with his latest girlfriend, Aki. The girl stood there quietly, blushing at the ground.  
  
"Just firing up the grill," Inu-Yasha smirked.  
  
"Is that what you call it?" a female voice came from around the corner. Seconds later, Kirara, one of Inu-Yasha's oldest friends, came around the corner, her boyfriend, Shippo, behind her.  
  
Inu-Yasha responded by sticking his tongue out at her. "Anyone want a drink?"  
  
"Beer," Miroku said. "And Sango'll take a wine cooler."  
  
"Beer's fine by me," said Kirara, sitting at the picnic table.  
  
"You know I don't drink," Shippo spoke when Inu-Yasha turned to him, holding up the bottle of water he brought with him.  
  
"Sorry, forgot. How 'bout you two?" Inu-Yasha turned to Hiten and Aki.  
  
"A beer will be fine," Hiten said, and Aki just nodded.   
  
Inu-Yasha shrugged, 'She sure is quiet,' as he turned to retrieve their drinks from the cooler.  
  
"So, Yash, I'm assuming you have grilled before," Sango asked warily.  
  
"Ano... actually, I never have," Inu-Yasha scratched the back of his head, laughing uncomfortably.  
  
Sango sighed, "Then I'll do it."  
  
"Arigatou, Sango-chan."  
  
"Oh, isn't my Sango just amazing?" Miroku asked no one in particular. The group just eyed him warily.  
  
"So, Shippo," Inu-Yasha attempted to change the subject, "how's little Hikage doing? You guys find a babysitter okay?" Shippo and Kirara had a two-year-old son, and were planning to be married... eventually.  
  
"Hai, Kirara's parents have her for the weekend. Something about a church festival, and us needing 'quality time' together," Shippo shrugged, taking a sip of his water.  
  
Kirara walked up, wrinkling her nose, "They're so weird sometimes, really. Kaasan mentioned something about giving Hikage an ototo or imoto... she's not so subtle with her hints these days."  
  
Shippo's eyebrows were now hidden by messy red bangs. "NANI?!" he said, turning to Kirara, gaping.  
  
Kirara merely shrugged in response, drinking her beer. Inu-Yasha chuckled, patting his friend's shoulder. "Yash! Where's the meat?" Miroku drew his attention.  
  
"In the fridge, I'll go get it." Seconds later, Miroku took the tray from Inu-Yasha's hands, carrying it to Sango, who stood over the grill. Inu-Yasha turned to talk to Hiten and Aki, who had been silently sitting to the side.  
  
"HENTAI!" A resounding "smack" hung in the now still air. "Not in public, you irokichigai!"  
  
"Sango, koi, I just can't help it. Whenever I get near you..." Miroku was stopped mid-sentence as Inu-Yasha grabbed him by the back of his shirt, pulling him away. Sango turned back to the grill, her face red with anger.  
  
"Baka, when will you ever learn?" Inu-Yasha rolled his eyes at his friend, releasing him.  
  
"Yash, have you ever taken a good look at Sango's..." Inu-Yasha raised a hand to cut him off.  
  
"I REALLY don't want to hear about Sango's ANYTHING." Miroku crossed his arms in a pout. A faint giggling came from Aki. Everyone gaped at the girl, who had been silent up until that point.  
  
"Your friends are a little weird," she said to Hiten in a stage whisper.  
  
"Hai. That's why we all get along so well," Hiten wrapped an arm around her shoulders, smirking at his friends' shocked faces.  
  
"What's that smell?" Kirara asked, sniffing the air. The group was all pulled out of their stupor, trying to identify the smell in the air.  
  
"Kami-sama! The burgers!" came Sango's cry, as she turned around to quickly flip the burgers. "Yash, they're almost done. You might want to get the other stuff."  
  
After enlisting Shippo and Miroku's aid, all of the food was laid on the picnic table. "Dig in, minna!" Hands shot out, grabbing plates and filling them with food. A hush fell over the group as they all munched happily.  
  
"So, Yash, how's it feel to be twenty-one?" Miroku asked between bites.  
  
"Yuuryou. Although I don't know how long I can keep this pace up," Inu-Yasha replied, taking another bite.  
  
"What did you end up doing yesterday, anyways? I tried calling, but I only got your machine?"  
  
"I... ano... I visited... Kikyo," the last word was hardly a whisper.  
  
"Oh." The rest of the meal was eaten in silence, and Inu-Yasha pondered on the day before. The day had been sunny and warm, a gentle breeze had ruffled Inu-Yasha's hair as he kneeled at her grave. He had laid a bouquet of wildflowers on her headstone, and spoken to her for hours. The tears had flowed freely, and he held nothing back. He told her everything he had been too afraid to say in life. On the drive home, he had felt peaceful.  
  
"So, Yash, ready to open your presents?" Shippo asked, pulling his friend from his reverie.  
  
"Did you say 'presents'?" Inu-Yasha smirked, tossing the forgotten burger aside and standing up.  
  
"Open mine first!" Miroku handed him a package, an evil glint in his eye.  
  
"Do I want to?" Inu-Yasha eyed the package suspiciously, quirking an eyebrow at his friend's eagerness.  
  
"It's perfectly safe, chigiri. It's from both of us," Sango smiled at him. Reassured, Inu-Yasha tore into the paper, and opened the box. He pulled out another, smaller box, and a picture frame. Suspended in the frame was a block of glass, which rotated on a wire, so that two pictures could be displayed. One side held a picture of Inu-Yasha and Miroku, taken at a bonfire party the summer before. The other side was a picture of Miroku holding Sango in front of him, Inu-Yasha next to him, holding Kikyo. A lump caught in his throat at the memory, his fingers idly brushing across her image. "I don't remember that other box," Sango's voice caught his attention, and he hastily set the frame aside.  
  
"You don't? I'm sure you do," Miroku subtly winked at his girlfriend, but she crossed her arms and examined him carefully. Despite his suspicions, Inu-Yasha opened the box, and produced... a sucker. Miroku and Hiten immediately collapsed into peals of laughter, and Inu-Yasha glared at them.  
  
"Is that... are those... breasts?" Shippo asked, leaning over Inu-Yasha's shoulder to closer examine the candy.  
  
"Hai," Inu-Yasha grunted, still glaring at the laughing heap that was once Miroku and Hiten.  
  
"Tag, you're it!" Hiten choked out between fits of laughter.  
  
Sango tilted her head to the side, a puzzled look on her face. "Inu-Yasha, why would my boyfriend be giving you a sucker in the shape of a woman's breasts? And why does Hiten find this so amusing?"  
  
Inu-Yasha set down the sucker, softening his expression as he turned to the girl. "A year or so ago, the three of us were driving aimlessly, and decided to stop at the porn shop. Miroku wanted to get a new pipe. Hiten couldn't find his I.D., so the guy wouldn't let him in. He waited while Miroku and I looked around. We must have been in there for a while, because Hiten called Miroku's cell phone, wondering what was taking so long."  
  
"So, I decided," Miroku had regained his composure, and stood next to Inu-Yasha, placing a hand on his shoulder, "to buy something as a consolation prize for our unfortunate friend." A thoughtful hand went to his chin, "I never did get that pipe. Oh, well. Hiten was not amused, to say the least."  
  
"Then," Hiten came up, also now under control, mimicing Miroku's earlier movements, "I wrapped it up and gave it to Miroku for his birthday. The look on his face was enough to make Yash and I crack up. So, Miroku and I decided it was Yash's turn."  
  
Inu-Yasha growled at them, and they quickly took their hands from his shoulders. Sango giggled, and Shippo and Kirara gave into all-out laughing fits. Even Aki let a giggle slip past her lips. Inu-Yasha sighed, shaking his head. 'Hai, my friends are definitely weird. But I wouldn't trade them for the world.' He then tackled Miroku and Hiten, and they wrestled as the sun went down, smoke from the grill circling lazily into the sky.  
  
Kaagome: There's Sango for you! And you'll have to wait a few more chapters before Kagome comes in, but she will be coming!  
  
~*A/N: So there's a light and fun chappy for y'all. I was going to split up the two days, but I figured you were all sick of depressing chapters, and, quite frankly, so am I. So, go to Suncoast and buy pocky! Did I mention that I love pocky? Hmm... *wanders off, munching pocky* Happy Thanksgiving! Ja ne, minna!*~ 


End file.
